“Should we show The Passion this week at Bible study?” Ashlee asked me last week.  Within the span of 20 seconds I had an entire conversation in my head: “But it’s aweful. Painful. Over the top even. The girls will hate that we made them watch it. Most have already seen it -why go through that again.  Ugh, I should want to watch it. It’s the right thing to do (subject myself to), afterall, it is Easter.”

“We probably should” I answered with some hesitance.

It was painful.  As I suppose it should be.  That kind of thing should never be easy to watch.  Through tears I prayed silently in my heart. “I can’t believe you love me so much. Thank you.  I am sorry that you had to do this.  Thank you for your love.” All that I could think about was how Mary must have felt.  I don’t think I could do it…watch my child go through that.  She had so much faith in a God that she couldn’t see, who had promised to make all things new.  I don’t think my faith is as big as hers.

This morning Graham and I were talking about God’s grace.  About how radical it is. About how it insults our better judgement as “faithful” Christians.  About how we are afraid that if we teach too much about God’s grace, then people will become apathetic lazy Christians.  It feels safer to teach “yeah, grace…but…”

It occurred to me that apathy toward the gospel and what Jesus did for us on the cross may NOT actually be the biggest problem that we face as Christians today.

It occurred to me that there is something else, just as big and even more ugly and insulting to God, lurking beneath our shiny Christian surface.

It is the sub-conscious mentality that what Jesus did on the cross was not enough. That is was powerful, selfless, amazing, admirable, humbling…but not enough.  

What we communicate (and convince ourselves of) even in the most God-loving Christian circles is that what we need in order to please God, is Jesus’ work on the cross + consistent church attendance or the right amount of service or more sacrifice or more risk, or more obedience, or more giving, or more doing for God…

YES - these are all good things and many are even commands found in Scripture but when Jesus said “It is finished” with nails in his hands and blood dripping down his face, he did not mean “Step 1 on your path to righteousness is complete, now you start your half of the bargain.”  

He meant IT.IS.FINISHED.

“God’s grace isn’t seen in the lessening of His demands toward us; He always has and always will demand perfect obedience.  His grace is experienced when we come to realize that His perfect demands for each of us have already been met by Jesus. He lived the life we couldn’t live and died the death we should have died…Christianity is the only faith system where God both makes the demands and meets them.” - Tullian Tchividjian (Surprised by Grace)

In God’s eyes you are FULLY and COMPLETELY justified, holy, righteous, and GOOD ENOUGH if in faith and with sorrow and humility in your heart over your sin you accept His death for you on the cross. IT.IS.FINISHED. This is the “shocking” good news of the Bible. 

The criminal on the cross next to Jesus who BELIEVED was saved in that instant.  Do you know what he accomplished for God in his lifetime? Nothing.  Do you know how his prayer life was? Non-existent.  His knowledge of the teachings of scripture? Probably minimal. Do you know how many people he witnessed to in his life time? NONE.

I am no more righteous than that man.  I am no more favored by God.  I am no more esteemed.  I am no more pleasing to God than this man, because when God looks at me and when he looks at that “criminal,” He sees the same righteousness of His son Jesus and the same penalty paid for rebellious humanity - no matter how I like to pretty my life up with doing things for God.

God’s grace is hard to understand.  It is hard to wrap my mind around why He would do what He did for me and how, while I should be obedient to scripture and do things that are pleasing to God, at the end of the day it does not effect my standing with Him. That sounds risky to even write…

Ironically, the radical gospel of God’s grace toward us actually compels us to want to obey Christ more, not less. But even this proper motive is the work of the Holy Spirit in us and not something that we can authentically conjure on our own.

God, please help me not to insult your son’s sacrifice on the cross by living out or communicating to others, even indirectly, that what Jesus did on the cross was not enough and needs to be added to by our being the best we can be or doing the best we can do for you.

The Mommy and Chloe Variety Show (also titled “How we spend a rainy Monday afternoon) :)

When it comes to your business, do you feel free or do you feel like you are on a never ending treadmill set at a pace that is out of your control?

What is it going to take for you to “make it”?  Are you advertising on the best possible site?  Do you blog 3 times a week? Do you tweet a dozen times a day?  Are you active of Facebook? Posting enough videos on Youtube? Going to enough conferences? Handing out enough business cards? Are your business cards unique enough? Does your branding need a re-vamp? Are you keeping up with trends?  Are you taking enough work to get your name out there? Do you have the right gear? Are you networking with vendors?  What about trade shows?  Have you been published yet? Maybe you should look into print advertising…

Is your head spinning yet? Maybe this is everyday normal life for you.  Anyone trying to make it in the wedding or photography industry has felt the wave of “what needs to be done to make it” well up and come barreling toward them at full speed.  The fear of loss of potential clients, opportunities, followers, etc. feels very real and that fear is what keeps you working into the wee hours of the night, 12 hours a day, on weekends, during your “vacation” (that is if you have time to take a vacation).  The industry is fast paced and if you aren’t keeping up with the current you will get left behind on the shore…right?

What I am about to say will either piss you off or it will utterly free you.

Do you believe that your business is under God’s control and not yours? Do you believe that you could do all the right things for your business, advertise in all the right ways, but if God doesn’t allow your business to grow then it won’t?  Nothing. Zip. Fail. Likewise, is it possible that you can literally be a no-name person with a tiny little business that only your mom and your best friend know about and, if God chooses, He has the power to make you one of the most sought after people in your industry?  If you believe that God is in control of your success or failure then why are you anxiously WORKING YOURSELF TO DEATH as though it is up to you?  

Maybe you don’t believe in God.  If this is true then what I am saying does not apply to you.  You are right.  It is up to you.  You are on your own to make things happen. Keep doing what you are doing and hopefully, someday, it will all pay off.

But if you do believe in God then are you enjoying and living out the freedom that this provides?

The obvious question that we struggle with is where to draw the line between necessary effort and letting go?  The answer is you draw it at your priorities (meaning God’s priorities for you).  Yes, most things worth attaining require sacrifice BUT if that sacrifice is your time for God and your time with your family and the people that God has put into your life then you are not acting out your belief in God’s sovereignty over your business. You are saying that God is limited and confined, or (on the other side) can be controlled by the amount of “sacrifice” that you are making.  The saying that God helps those who help themselves is a lie.  The truth is that God characteristically helps those who 1) give up control 2) can’t help themselves 3) don’t even deserve to be helped in the first place.

How is your marriage?  Your relationship with your kids?  Your health? Are you a good friend? How is your relationship with God?

Please do not read this and feel guilty.  That is not my intention.  I do not even remotely have it all together…which is why I write.  These posts are challenges to myself. But these questions can provide a tangible measure of the extent to which you and I have allowed ourselves to put more time and emotion and money and effort into things that are good things, but they are not the most precious and valuable things.

Don’t believe the lie that you have to let those most precious things suffer now so that you can enjoy them later.  The truth is that you are not even promised a “later.” I am choosing to trust in God’s control instead of my own attempt at control no matter how real the risks of letting go may feel. Dare to step off the never ending treadmill with me.

It has been such a crazy week.  Tomorrow we leave for GA to celebrate Wes’ (my brother-in-law) completion of Ranger school.  I am really looking forward to getting to spend time with Graham’s family and to see my newest sister-in-law one more time before she has her baby boy (Chloe’s first cousin) due in May.  I am just so proud of all of my brothers, Wes included.  I took this picture of him at his graduation from West Point Military Academy last year.  We are so proud of you Wes!

“For the Lord takes pleasure in His people; He will beautify the humble with salvation.” - Psalm 149:4

Looks aside, who is the most beautiful woman you know?  What are the characteristics that make her beautiful?  

In my mind, she is passionate and loving. She is gentle and kind. She is compassionate. She unifies.  She invites you in and listens while you pour out your heart. She is not afraid to be transparent. She gives no pretense of being perfect.  She is fearless. She is bold. She is confident. She is patient and giving. She is joyful, encouraging, inspiring, and peaceful. She laughs and has a glad heart.

It really struck me this morning that all of these things are meant to be the byproducts or effect of salvation - giving control of your life over to God with sorrow over the things that you have done wrong and faith that God is who He says that he is in his word, the Bible.

” For the Lord takes pleasure in His people; He will beautify the humble with salvation.” - Psalm 149:4

Salvation is possibly the most dramatic beautification process you can go through as a woman. With God now living in you, you are equipt with both His desires and abilities.

The woman beautified by salvation can be passionate and loving because she has felt and seen the incredible, selfless, life-altering love of God.  She can be gentle and kind because God has given her empathy for others and the ability to choose her words carefully. She can be compassionate because she loves what God loves, people. She unifies because God has given her a selflessness that puts others above herself.  She will invite you in and listen while you pour out your heart because she truly cares about your pain above her own.  She is not afraid to be transparent for God’s glory. She gives no pretense of being perfect because she knows that His power is made perfect in weakness.  She is fearless because she trusts Him to take care of her.  She is bold because she is secure in His love for her. She is confident in God’s power, plan and care. She is patient because God is patient with her and giving because she knows that it all belongs to Him anyway.  She is joyful, encouraging, inspiring, peaceful.  She laughs and has a glad heart because, despite her circumstances, her joy comes from the Lord.

Thank you God for caring about beauty and for working an “extreme heart makeover” in my life.  I know you are not done yet, I see the pains of that every day, but I am grateful that you promise to patiently beautify me until the work is done!

“Love is in the Air” (hehehe)

A very happy and love-filled Valentines Day from me to you!

The moment you saw that particular piece begin to come together it sent a little lightening bolt of energy through your veins!  Your heart beat a little faster.  You knew that you had created something that shouted YOUR particular style and finally seeing your unique vision come to life made you feel like you could do this kind of work forever!

Isn’t that what creating is all about?!  There may be a million people out there doing what you are doing but YOU are the only one who sees the world through your eyes!  

I whole-heartedly believe that every single person is capable of creating something truly unique that is a reflection of who they are and how they see the world.  If we know this, then why can it be so hard to find and stand behind a style that is our own? In all of the years that I have been doing photography I still struggle to find my unique voice, a style of work that is uniquely mine.  There are moments when I know that I have hit on something that really is “me” - something that I connect with immediately…but then that  moment gets pushed aside, forgotten, ignored, “corrected,” stifled.  Why?   If we are each unique then why do so many of us face a creative identity crisis?  

If you are just trying to make a living with no desire to set yourself a apart then disregard this…but you will be doing yourself a disservice.  If there is anything in you that knows that you have something buried in there that is unique to offer the world then I challenge you today to take a close look at your portfolio of work, your website maybe, and ask yourself these questions as you look piece by piece:

Was this piece created by inspiration or imitation?  

Does this piece reflect anything unique about me or my style?

If I had to represent my style with one piece, could this be it?

Once you have honestly answered these questions, I challenge you to eliminate pieces from your portfolio that did not pass the test.  This can be hard, especially as an amateur trying to please a diverse crowd.  I challenge you to listen to your gut.  Fear of loosing clients should never be the motivation behind keeping a piece of work on display.

Next, create a place where you can print up, hang, or post your favorite pieces of work that you have created…the ones that excite you, energize you, represent what you are trying to do, say something about you and your unique style and put those somewhere where you can see them in your work space every day!  Be your own inspiration for once!

There is a lot that can be gained in seeking out others work for inspiration but the only truly unique creative path is the one that you carve out yourself!

Does leaving a legacy sound overwhelming?  If you are like me, my goals for the day sound something like this…1) finally pick dried strawberry off of the kitchen floor under the high chair 2) finish the load of laundry that you started last week 3) have an uninterrupted quiet time…hardly the stuff of legacies right?

I was reading a beautiful blog post from my mother-in-law and was reminded that making a lasting impact in the lives of the people around you is NOT limited to those with resources, free time, celebrity or even a platform.

Legacies are not limited to formation by attractive action, legacies are also built with a well placed word to a hungry heart.

More then what you DID, you will likely be remembered by how you made people feel. This is scary powerful because we are imperfect people and despite our (insert “my”) best efforts the legacy of a poorly delivered message can be hard to reshape.  Again, we are not, and cannot be perfect people.

My point is this.  Its not so much that every word “counts” (It does in a way, but this creates an impossible standard to hold each other to) but what is the message that is coming out the most frequently, passionately, consistently?  What will your children remember hearing the most come out of your mouth…or not coming out of your mouth?  What is the message most frequently communicated to your spouse?  To your friends? 

Words are the only resource that are free and in limitless supply.  Be intentional about the message that you want to send to those around you and send it passionately, frequently and consistently.  That is the stuff that legacies are made of.

And heres the thing…you are leaving a legacy one way or another.  You have the power to choose what yours will be.

Are you existing or living?  Does it feel like you are just trying getting through life right now? Are you weighed heavy with burdens going through days that blur together?  Sweet friend, God has made you for SO.MUCH.MORE.  God did not make you just to suffer well for His glory. He made you and then bought you back out of death so that you could live out JOY, PEACE, CONTENTMENT, INTIMACY, SECURITY,BEAUTY, and STRENGTH.

If you are hurting and carrying heavy burdens I really encourage you to do two things today:  

First, bring those concerns,hurts, and anxieties to God.  Be transparent with Him about how you feel and trust that He desires your good and is capable of COMPLETE RESTORATION in your life.  JUST.LET.GO.

Second, serve and encourage someone else.  One of the very best things we can do to get out of an inward-thinking slump is to direct our thoughts and actions outward to intentionally serve, encourage and build up someone else.  You never know what is going on in the heart of the person right next to you. 

God made you to do so much more than just exist.

Love,

Shay